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My Dishwasher Doesn’t Have a First Name?

Triumph! As promised I have learned how to use the dishwasher and am ready to share the secrets to defeating that monster.

If you follow these easy yet somewhat inconvenient steps you will have clean dishes in no time:

Step 1 – Take the clean dishes that are in the dishwasher and put them away. If you don’t you will have no room to put the dirty dishes.

Step 2 – Take the dirty dishes and wash them by hand. I know this sounds completely outrageous because if you wash the dishes, why do need the dish washer? The answer is only minimally wash them to reduce grease build up, a heavy rinse should suffice.

Step 3 – Put the rinsed dishes and load them into the dishwasher. Put plates, pans and silverware on the bottom tray, while putting pots, bowls, and cups on the top tray.

Step 4 – The the washer detergent type thing into the compartment on the inside of the door and close the compartment. (Sorry I don’t know what the actual name is.)

Step 5 – This is by far the most important step, CLOSE THE MACHINE DOOR. If you don’t you and your floor will be very unhappy.

Step 6 – Push the buttons on the door that say “pots and pans”, “big load”, “extra dry”, and “start wash”.

Step 7 – Repeat steps 1 through 6 when the sink gets full again.

That is the full proof way to conquer the dishwasher. Also if you would like visual aide, they are located at the top of the page  in “Household Comics”.

While Marcus was teaching me how to do all of this Adam said, “Let’s just push all the buttons and see what happens.”

Sadly this is actually a good idea. I know this because me and Adam tried it one time while Marcus wasn’t home and the dishes came out spotless.

Remember I was also the guy who couldn’t properly put out the recycling (Which I did correctly this week!) so don’t exactly take my word on that last bit of advice.

Now as the house continues to be explored I am continuously finding new things that I do not recognize and I will post about them. However, in order for this to be a forum I need to post what you want to read about.

That being said, if there is anything I have yet to discuss that you would like to hear an apartment dwellers perception of please post it in a comment.

And as all ways keep wandering through that maze, just don’t touch anything that looks like it could cause you harm (ie. can opener).


A Home Without Upstairs Neighbors or a Recycling Shoot

What happens when you spend the first 18 years of your life growing up in an apartment in Brooklyn, NY and then move into a four bedroom house in Tempe, AZ? The correct answer is you now have at least four rooms that make no sense to you.

I’ll start at square one. My name is Jeffrey Platt, although “Jeff” will do just fine, and I am a student at the Walter Cronkite School of Journalism. I just relocated from my humble apartment style upbringings in New York to a house in Tempe, and after realizing that I have no clue of neither how to live in a house nor use half the appliances I decide to create this blog to open a forum of discussion for anyone going through the same change.

(Side note for all the ladies reading this; I enjoy long walks on the beach, poetry, and candle light dinners. Just in case you’re interested.)

Back to business. It only took me eight days to unpack and the first piece of guidance I would like to provide is to try and unpack in one or two days, not eight.

Now that it’s clear that my way of doing things is probably the incorrect way I can start using my housemates (Marcus, Adam, and John), who all grew up in houses, to help me provide you with useful information.

The first screw-up happened when I attempted to take out the recycling. The correct way is somewhat obvious, just not to me.

Marcus,who was raised in both Arizona and California, said, “When you take out the recycling you need to make the lid close. Also it goes in the street, not on the sidewalk. That reminds me next time put it facing the house not sideways.”

What happened to that small cramped room on my floor with the garbage shoot and one blue recycling bin for everyone to throw their bottles and cans? Its gone and now you’re responsible for taking you’re own recycling to the curb or the garbage man. Something about that just doesn’t sound right.

Anyway I’ll leave you to mull over Marcus’ brilliant insight on residential recycling, but that’s it for this week.

Stay tuned as next week we learn about the Apartment Native’s fantasy, the dishwasher.